My All
by johnliz4ever
Summary: She'd give anything for him to be back here with her. Crossover with SG1. ElizabethJohn.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate Atlantis of it's characters but I do own the poem at the beginning.

Note: This one started off as a drabble and now…

**My All**

_If I should die while you sleep_

_Do not mourn; do not weep_

_Just know that my watchful gaze_

_Will be with you until the end of days_

_And I know a time will come_

_When we will be forever as one_

_-Written by johnliz4ever_

_

* * *

_  
Elizabeth watched as a probe was sent for the Earth Stargate.

Visuals came up in the screen in front of them and Elizabeth stared at what she was seeing. Atlantis was still there, she knew what that meant though.

She closed her eyes and allowed a tear to fall from her eyes.  
John who was standing next to her looked down before looking at Colonel Caldwell and General O'Neill.  
They both nodded and John closed his eyes.  
He turned to Elizabeth and wrapped his arms around her tightly. He placed his cheek against hers and whispered.

"I have to do this Lizzie, I'm coming back to you, I promise"

Elizabeth nodded as tears fell freely from her eyes.

"You better come back"

John pulled away from her and placed his lips on hers gently.

"I will always be with you"

He cupped her cheeks and gave her one last kiss before following Colonel Caldwell into the 'Gate room.

Colonel Caldwell stepped onto the ramp in front of the military team.

"You know the drill; stop the Wraith from reaching Earth and this galaxy. We know that Wraith may be in the city but thanks to our scientist who disabled the shield permanently, we should be able to get in without any problems. Once there we will retrieve any technology we can, only engage the Wraith if they see you, we don't want a bloodbath and then myself and Colonel Sheppard will set the self destruct. I won't lie to you, they may be a chance we won't get back, if it turns out that we have to use the ZPM to defend ourselves we will. I'm going to give you all one last chance to back out"

The whole military assembly stayed still and Caldwell nodded at John who stood in front of them.

"Myself and Colonel Caldwell will go through first. When we are safely through, Dr Weir will give you the command to go through the 'Gate"

John and Caldwell grabbed their equipment and walked up the ramp to the Stargate. John hesitated as he stood at the foot of the event horizon. Caldwell turned to him.

"You can still back out Sheppard. I won't think any less of you"

John knew what he meant and was touched by Caldwell's concern.

"I have to do it. I know it, you know it, Elizabeth knows it"

Caldwell nodded.

"God speed son"

John turned round and looked Elizabeth one last time before stepping through the event horizon with Caldwell.

* * *

Elizabeth watched from the control room as John stepped through the Stargate. She wanted to cry but didn't allow herself, she knew she had to be strong. 

"_Elizabeth, it's clear. Send through the team…I love you"_

Elizabeth covered her mouth to keep back the sobs before whispering.

"I love you too"

Elizabeth walked over to the microphone and sighed for a moment before speaking.

"Best of luck out there. Move out"

She watched as Aiden Ford walked up the ramp leading the team to the Stargate, he turned back to face the team for a moment before stepping into the Stargate.

She watched the military walk through the event horizon, as the last member walked through the Stargate shut down and Elizabeth buried her head in her hands fiercely fighting back her tears.

Rodney watched as the woman he though of as a sister broke down into tears, he saw Teyla walked up to her, wrapping her arms around her trying to fight back her own tears and fears that she may never see Aiden again.

Rodney walked over to them and wrapped his arms around both of them.

**

* * *

1 week later**

"It's been a week Jack. One week and we haven't heard anything."

Elizabeth slammed her hands hard on the desk and Jack jumped back slightly. Elizabeth sighed and sat back down in her chair opposite him, slouching slightly.

Jack was sympathetic, he was. He wanted to know as much as Elizabeth what had happened to them, but he knew it was more personal for Elizabeth.

Jack sat forward and looked at her

"Elizabeth…I can't imagine what you're going through and, I know this sounds selfish, but I hope I never have to feel what you're going though, but we never had a time frame on how long this mission could go on for. Just give them time Elizabeth."

Elizabeth nodded, stood up and left his office. When she was gone Jack sighed.

She was a mess.

He stood up and paced about. He'd hate to think what she'd be like if _'the team' _didn't come back.  
But he knew it was much more than just the team, sure she'd be upset if they didn't come back, but Jack knew her despair was for John. She was mad about him, she wasn't dependant on him but she did need him.

**

* * *

2 Days later**

Elizabeth rolled onto her side and sighed. The beds in the SGC were not the most comfortable in the world but she wasn't leaving the SGC until the team checked in or came back. She ran her fingers through her hair, deciding that sleep wasn't going to come she rolled over and turned the small bedside light on. As she sat up, she was shocked by what she saw.

"John?"

John put a finger across his lips.

"Shhh, I shouldn't be here. I'm suppose to let you sleep"

He walked out of the shadows of the room, over to were she was sitting on the bed. He sat down next to her and ran his fingers through her hair.

"Why didn't they call me?"

John smiled and placed his hand on her cheek.

"I told them not to. I wanted to talk to you without everyone there."

John cupped her face and kissed her deeply.

"I've missed you so much"

Tears fell onto Elizabeth's cheeks.

"I've missed you to. I've been so lonely and lost with out you"

John smiled and wrapped her in his arms.

"I will always be with you"

Elizabeth could feel the warmth of his skin as they touched. She ran her fingers through his crazy wild hair and moaned.  
John laid her down and kissed her. Elizabeth ran her fingers down his back.  
They eventually pulled away from each other breathless. John moved to her side and turned the light off, he then snuggled next to her and kissed her cheek.

"Elizabeth, when you wake up look in the cupboard, underneath those blankets. There's something there I want you to have"

Elizabeth looked at him slightly confused.

"What is it?"

John placed one of his fingers to her lips.

"Everything will be clearer in the morning."

**

* * *

The next day**

Elizabeth woke up the next morning, cold and alone. She sat up, the right side of the bed, where John had been was smooth and no trace of his warmth was there. Elizabeth shook her head; he must have gone already.

She stood up and began to get changed until she remembered what John had told her last night.  
She walked, smiling over to the cupboard and opened it. She moved the blankets and saw a small box with a note attached.  
She picked up the note and read it

_Elizabeth, _

_If you're reading this it means I'm too late and you've already found it._

_Open the box; I think you'll know what it means. _

_All my love_

_John_

Elizabeth nervously opened the box and gasped at what she saw inside.

It was a beautifully stunning white gold ring, it was gorgeous by itself but in the middle was a beautiful pink diamond. Elizabeth was reduced to whimpers when she saw it. It was amazing.  
Elizabeth smiled and looked down examining the ring more closely. She placed the note on the table next to her as she did she saw that there was more writing. She picked it up and read it.

_Okay, just in case you don't get what this is I'll ask._

_Elizabeth Weir, will you marry me?_

Elizabeth slowly slid the ring onto the fourth finger of her left hand. It was a perfect fit.

"Yes John I will"

She looked at the ring and was about to head out to find John when there was a knock at the door.

"Come in"

An airman came into the room

"Ma'am, you're needed in the briefing room"

Elizabeth turned round and smiled at the Airman.

"I'll be right there"

She quickly placed the blankets back into the cupboard and left the room, leaving the box and the note on the table.  
Elizabeth definitely felt better today. John was back, the team was back and they could all finally get on with their lives.

As she entered the briefing room she saw Jack, Teyla, Rodney and Caldwell all sat down. Aiden was stood with his back to her looking out of the window.

They all looked gloomy and Elizabeth figured something bad must have happened.

"What's going on?"

Teyla looked up at her first, tears singing her brown eyes. She stood up and walked round to Elizabeth taking her hands.

"Please come and sit down"

Elizabeth nodded and followed the Athosian woman to an empty seat. She looked around at the people with her.

"Can someone tell me what's going on?"

A voice from behind her, which she knew was Aiden, began

"We had to use the ZPM to power the shield; we've spent the last few days trying to find a new ZPM. We found one, but the planet was highly populated with Wraith. We thought it was worth the risk…"

Elizabeth couldn't help but notice how Aiden's voice was cracking

"…we got the ZPM and started back, but we came under fire and some of the team, including myself, Colonel Caldwell and Colonel Sheppard were taken…"

Elizabeth couldn't handle Aiden's stalling anymore.

"Aiden, cut to the chase"

Aiden lowered his head. He had to tell her this to her face; he left the window and walked to the table, taking a seat next to Elizabeth.  
She could clearly see that he'd been crying, his eyes were red and puffy.

Aiden took one of Elizabeth's hands and drew his thumb over the skin. He looked down at their hands before facing her.

"Elizabeth…John didn't make it"

Elizabeth shook her head and smiled

"He did, he…I…"

Tears began to fall from Elizabeth's eyes

"He came to see me in my quarters last night. He's alive"

Aiden shook his head and held her hand tighter.

"He died last night Elizabeth, in one of the Jumpers. He ascended"

Elizabeth shook her head again and looked down at her free hand.

"No…no he…he told me where to find this"

She showed him the ring and Aiden looked at it shocked.

"He was going to ask you to marry him, when we got back"

"He told me last night that he had a surprise, he told me to where to find it. There was a note"

Aiden closed his eyes allowing tears to fall from them

"I'm so sorry Elizabeth"

Elizabeth stood up and walked away from the table, looking at her friends.

"When did you get back?"

"This morning"

Elizabeth walked over to the window and turned her back towards them. They all looked away; all sensing she needed a few moments. They jumped when they heard her bang on the glass.

Teyla immediately stood up and walked over to her, grabbing Elizabeth in her arms and holding her. Elizabeth resisted at first but eventually broke down and placed her head on Teyla's shoulder. Sobs racked her body. Teyla slid her hand though Elizabeth's hair and gently shushed her.

Teyla turned her head and looked at the men in the room.

They understood her look and left the room leaving the two grieving women alone.

TBC…


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate Atlantis or SG1.

**3 Days later**

Elizabeth sat quietly, numbly opposite Kate Heightmeyer. Jack hand ordered her to see someone, when she refused Jack requested Kate's help.

Kate agreed but only so someone didn't upset Elizabeth.

Elizabeth looked down at her ring, which she was spinning around her finger.

Kate wrote down how unwilling to talk Elizabeth was.

They'd been sat there in silence for 15 minutes. Kate leant forward and placed her hand on Elizabeth's arm.

"Elizabeth"

Elizabeth sharply looked up at her and Kate could see the tears in her eyes.

"What do you want me to say Kate? John is gone, he left me and he ascended. That's it. Do I hate him…?"

Elizabeth looked down at her ring

"Sometimes yes. I hate him for making me love him and than for leaving me"

Kate nodded and wrote something down.

"You said you saw John the night he died. Do you think he came back to say goodbye?"

Elizabeth shrugged.

"I know I wasn't dreaming he was so warm and…and he was just John. He told me where to find the ring, but he told me not to look for it until the morning"

Tears fell from Elizabeth's eyes and Kate handed her a tissue. Elizabeth thanked her.

"Kate…do you think Jack will let me leave the SGC. I just need to start finding somewhere to live; I can't live in the SGC forever."

Kate nodded

"I'm sure he will"

Elizabeth nodded and stood up.

"I should go ask him"

Before Kate could stop her Elizabeth was out of the room.

**

* * *

2 Days later**

Elizabeth watched as a reef of flowers was guided through the event horizon, Elizabeth had been asked to say something but she declined. There was nothing she could say about the men and women who lost their lives. She wasn't there, she didn't know what happened and she didn't want to know. It was still to painful.

Instead Aiden was going to do the speech. He walked up the ramp and to the podium.

He cleared his throat before beginning.

"I searched for ages, trying to find the words to honour the men and women who lost their lives, but I couldn't and I think that proves that they were more special and important than words alone can state.

They sacrificed their lives not only for their country, but for everyone in this world, this galaxy and everyone in the Pegasus galaxy.

I don't think I'm far wrong when I say that they are heroes.

It's up to us left behind to remember and honour them.

And I hope that someday the world will know of their sacrifice and be able to thank them for it."

Elizabeth was fighting hard to keep back the tears when Aiden finished his speech, Aiden walked off the ramp, walked over to her and grabbed her hand as a sign of support. Elizabeth squeezed his hand in thanks. Inside she was breaking.

**

* * *

A month later**

Elizabeth sat down on her couch in her new apartment. She laid her legs on the couch and picked up the file, which had been laying on her coffee table for the last hour.

She hesitated before opening it. As she opened it, she was met with a picture of John Sheppard. She slid her fingers down the outline of his face and sighed.

She missed him so much.

"I know you're there John. I know ascended beings can look over people, even if they're not meant to. Just tell me you haven't deserted me"

Elizabeth placed the file next to her on the couch and stood up. She looked up at the ceiling.

"John?"

When no response came, she sighed and walked over to her balcony, which overlooked some beautiful rolling hills. She leant against the railing and dropped her head into one of her hands, closing her eyes.

"You know, I always figured we'd get a place like this"

Elizabeth's eyes snapped open and she lifted her head out of her hand turning quickly to the direction of the voice.

"John?"

The Colonel smirked at her and looked out across the hills. Elizabeth noted how he seemed to glow. He was dressed fully in while but his dishevelled hair was still the same.

Elizabeth continued to stare at him. Quite shocked he was actually there.

"Your actually here. I thought Ancients weren't allowed to interfere."

John tilted his head to one side slightly and gave her a small smile.

"You're right, we're not supposed to interfere. But if I _accidentally _say something…"

Elizabeth nodded and turned away from him before asking a question she really needed the answer to.

"Why did you leave me John?"

John closed his eyes and sighed. Seeing her full of hurt was killing him.

"Leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But it was my time Lizzie, it was just my time."

Elizabeth shook her head

"No it wasn't. We had our whole lives ahead of us…"

John watched as she looked down at the engagement ring, which still sat on her finger.

"…we were going to get married, despite the non vocal proposal. Without you…I don't know if I can do it. I've changed so much. I need you. I've got nothing of you left."

John smirked knowingly.

"You do have something of me left Elizabeth"

Elizabeth looked up at him, confusion clearly present on her face.

"What?"

John continued to smirk.

"You'll find out soon enough. Now close your eyes"

Elizabeth glared at him before doing as she was asked. She stayed like that for a few moments before she heard someone calling her name.

"Elizabeth"

Elizabeth opened her eyes and looked to where John had been standing. It was now empty.

Rodney walked onto the balcony and placed his hand on Elizabeth's arm.

"Elizabeth, it's raining. What are you doing out here, you're soaking"

For the first time Elizabeth realised her whole body was cold and wet.

"Come back inside"

Elizabeth nodded and left the balcony.

**

* * *

A month later**

Elizabeth bolted into one of the bathrooms at the SGC, quickly followed by Teyla.

Teyla watched in sympathy as Elizabeth leant over the bowl and began to vomit.

"Elizabeth, you should go see Dr Beckett."

Elizabeth shook her head and stood up unsteadily; she walked over to the washbasin and rinsed her mouth with water.

"I'm fine Teyla"

Just as she said that, another wave of sickness took Elizabeth over and she bolted back to the toilet.

Teyla smirked and added, quite cheekily.

"Of course Elizabeth. You are fine"

Elizabeth looked round and glared at her.

* * *

Elizabeth sat in the infirmary on one of the beds waiting for Dr Beckett to come back with her test results. 

In his office Carson was double checking the results, twice.

He looked out of his office window at Elizabeth before looking back at the results.

"Oh crap"

He knew Elizabeth didn't need what life was about to bestow on her, but she had no option but to accept it, and he had no choice but to tell her.

He left his office and walked over to Elizabeth. The infirmary was relatively quiet with just a few patients on the other side of the room. He reached Elizabeth and sat next to her.

"Elizabeth, I have your test results back. Elizabeth this isn't going to be easy, so I'll just say it. Elizabeth you're just over two months pregnant."

**:Flashback:**

Elizabeth ran her hand down John's cheek and kissed him. Tomorrow he was going back to Atlantis without any guarantees that he would return. John could already see the tears in Elizabeth's eyes. He cupped her cheek gently and placed his lips to hers so gently.

Elizabeth turned her head slightly and kissed the palm of his hand.

John placed his hands on her waist and looked at her deeply.

"I'm coming back Elizabeth. I promise"

Elizabeth nodded slowly and John pulled her into him. He wrapped his strong arms around her and held her, taking in the scent of subtle vanilla in her hair. Elizabeth's hands clutched at his shirt, it was like if she let go he'd disappear for good.

John slid down the bed and laid down pulling Elizabeth with him so she was laying slightly on top of him. He ran his fingers down her back and back up again.

There was so many things he wanted to say to her, wanted to tell her. The most clichéd thing to say would be that he loved her. Even though that was true, tomorrow he was off on a mission with a small chance of success, saying those three little words was something neither one of them needed.

Instead he settled for feeling her snuggle into his side while she ran her fingers through his hair.

John placed a kiss on her cheek before rolling her onto her back and laying on top of her, kissing her senseless. She ran her fingers through his hair and pushed him deeper into the kiss.

John's lips left her lips and began to trail down her neck, leaving a trail of warm wetness down her skin.

Elizabeth moaned as he kissed the hollow of her neck while unbuttoning her shirt.

He slipped her shirt easily off her shoulders and placed his mouth on her right breast.

Elizabeth continued to moan at his touch and clawed at his shirt, which she eventually removed.

John moved back up to her lips and kissed her before moving to her ear.

"I want you so much"

Elizabeth whispered into his ear.

"I want you too"

Perhaps saying 'I want you' was easier than saying 'I love you', but they meant both.

**:End of Flashback:**

Carson looked at Elizabeth worryingly as she spaced out.

"Elizabeth?"

He got no response; she continued to sit there, _thinking about that night, the night before he left her,_ Elizabeth placed her hand on her abdomen, _the night before he left their child._

Elizabeth stood up quickly and walked out of the infirmary before Carson could stop her.

* * *

Elizabeth sat on her couch, looking at the bottle of Scotch, which was sat on the table. 

She doesn't think she's been sober since John died. Another bottle couldn't hurt.

She didn't want this child, at least that's what she told herself, the truth was, she wanted John and seeing the child everyday would only remind her of that.

She leant across to the table, picked up the bottle and a glass and proceeded to pour a drink for herself. She brought it to her lips and just as she was about to pour the cool liquid into her mouth a voice came from behind her.

"Come on, don't do this"

Elizabeth didn't bother to look behind her, she knew who it was. She sipped at the Scotch, instantly feeling sick. She placed the Scotch and the glass back onto the table. She left her seat and went into the kitchen. When she got there she was met by a slightly angry John Sheppard, his arms folded across his chest.

"Did that make you feel better? Endangering the baby, like you've been doing these past two months."

Elizabeth ignored him and opened a cupboard door taking out a box of crackers before walking back into the living room. John followed her.

"Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth turned to face him.

"You're not really here. You're just in my mind"

Elizabeth walked to the couch and sat down taking a cracker from the box, she started to eat it, wincing at the horrible taste of it.

"Upset stomach?"

"Morning sickness. More like morning, noon and night sickness"

John came and stood in front of her.

"You're mad at me, aren't you?"

Elizabeth looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, I didn't think it was obvious"

She was very snippy but John knew it was just the hormones, and the fact that she was pissed at him.

John sat down next to her.

"I know you want this child Elizabeth. It's obvious"

Elizabeth looked away from him and continued munching on the crackers.

"Elizabeth, a part of me is still with you in this child. One day I will not be able to see you anymore and that day will come soon"

Elizabeth looked at him sharply

"What do you mean?"

John stood up and sighed.

"Elizabeth, I am permitted to see you only during the duration of your pregnancy, after that I will only be able to watch over the two of you. No interactions"

Elizabeth stood up facing him

"Why?"

John shook his head and sighed

"All I can tell you is that this child is so important. If you choose not to have the child, I will disappear straightaway."

Elizabeth walked over to the balcony.

"You mean if I have an abortion, you're gone"

John nodded

"John, how can you even think I would get rid of this child?"

John tilted his head

"You haven't seemed very happy about finding out your pregnant"

Elizabeth shrugged and leant against the railing.

"It's a shock John. I will have to raise the baby all by myself…" she lightly placed her hand on her abdomen "…you'll never know your child and he'll never know you"

John looked down at his feet and closed his eyes

"I know"

John looked up and saw the tears falling from her eyes. John longed to wrap his arms around her, to hold her and tell her everything was going to be fine.

"You'll be fine. If anyone can do this, it's you"

TBC…


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate Atlantis or SG1

* * *

**4 Months later**

Elizabeth sat in her office at the SGC. She placed a hand over her swollen abdomen and lightly rubbed it. The baby, as if sensing her, kicked where her hand was placed. Elizabeth smiled at the feeling. He was going to grow up like his father; she knew it.

She didn't know the sex of the baby but John always referred to the baby as 'he' and she wondered if he knew. John's visits had slowed in recent months. He usually tried to see her once a week, but slowly that had decreased to once every few weeks, until the point where she hadn't seen him in a month.

She had theories, one was the other Ancients had banned him from seeing her and the other was it was getting to painful for him to see her grow, knowing he'd never be able to know his child. Elizabeth wished that he would come see her but she knew it was difficult for him.

She looked back at the papers on her next. Treaties with different races of people, a new treaty with the Tok'ra. It was utterly boring. Elizabeth placed her head in her hands and sighed.

"Tired honey?"

Elizabeth looked up and smiled when she saw John smirking at her.

"Hey, I know you. You got me pregnant then disappeared."

John cringed

"Yeah, sorry, I've been meaning to come and see you. It's just…"

"…that it's difficult?" Elizabeth finished for him; John smirked at how well she knew him.

"You know me too well"

Elizabeth smiled at John for a moment before her smile fell; this was always difficult. He'd come and see her but have to leave too soon. There was never enough time for them. She looked back down at her papers; this was uncomfortable for both of them, John looked down for a moment before looking back at her.

"How is he?"

Elizabeth smiled

"He's fine."

John walked round to her and did something unexpected, he placed one of his hands on her abdomen and the baby kicked.

He hadn't touched her since the night he ascended and came to see her. She always figured he couldn't have contact with her.

"John…"

"Shhh, he can sense me, he knows I'm here."

Elizabeth was suddenly very grateful she didn't have a security camera in her office, explaining that she was having visits from her dead ascended fiancé and not telling anyone _might _put Jack in a bad mood.

Elizabeth lowered her hand and placed it on top of John's. John opened his eyes and looked at her. For the first time in his eyes, she saw hurt, pain and longing.

He placed his other hand on her cheek and Elizabeth closed her eyes, she felt him come closer to her; he lightly pressed his lips to hers. As she felt him pull back, she opened her eyes and saw that he was gone.

She placed her hand on her abdomen where his hand had just been.

The door to her office swung open and Daniel walked in

"Elizabeth, Jack said he needed the Tok'ra treaty…" He saw the tears in her eyes and walked over to. "…Elizabeth are you okay?"

Elizabeth nodded and turned to her desk.

"These are the papers"

She handed him a stack of papers and turned back to what she was working on before.

Daniel put the papers back down and leant against her desk facing her.

"Elizabeth…you know where here for you right?"

Elizabeth nodded keeping her eyes on the papers in front of her. She wanted to tell someone she was seeing John because she was slightly afraid she was going insane and that John wasn't coming to see her, that it was just her imagination. But she was afraid that if he really was coming to see her and she told someone the other Ancients would stop him from visiting. There was about three months to go until she gave birth and she knew that after that John wouldn't be able to visit anymore and she couldn't bare loosing the chance to see him any earlier.

Daniel placed a hand on her shoulder and she looked up at him. Daniel had genuine concern in his eyes.

"Elizabeth, I know how difficult this must be for you. I lost my wife, I'm sure you've already read that report. And it will be difficult, for a long time, but it will get better and you have people around you that will help you"

Elizabeth nodded and Daniel smiled slightly.

"I better get these papers to Jack before he court-martials me."

Daniel headed out of the room when Elizabeth's voice stopped him.

"Thank you"

Daniel turned to her but she was already looking back down at the papers. Daniel sighed and left her office.

**

* * *

2 Months later**

Daniel sat opposite Jack in his office; once again, he was worried about Elizabeth. Since his talk with her 2 months earlier he expected her to come and talk with him, it didn't happen. If anything, she'd isolated herself more and he knew it wasn't healthy.

"Jack, can't you just talk to her?"

Jack threw the mini basketball into the mini hoop, which was situation just next to the briefing room door before turning to Daniel.

"Danny, Elizabeth is a grown woman. If she thinks she can handle this she probably can. Anyway, you're closer to her than me; if you couldn't get through to her I doubt I can"

Daniel nodded

"Yes Jack, valid point but Elizabeth might need to talk to someone who doesn't know her so well; it might be the only way for her to open up."

Jack sat down and leaned over the desk

"Danny, I'm uncomfortable around pregnant women. Their hormones are everywhere; I mean I don't like to cross Elizabeth normally, but now…"

Jack shuddered and Daniel shook his head. Jack then got serious

"Danny, that woman has been to hell and back these last few months. What she really needs is our support. If she doesn't want to discuss it, don't push her."

Daniel smiled at Jack's soft side

"Jack, you have a soft side"

Jack smirked

"Don't tell Carter, but I like that woman. She can hold her own, I respect that."

Daniel smiled.

"Knew you liked her"

Jack smirked,

"I'll talk to her, if you really think it will do any good"

Daniel smiled at his triumph and left Jack's office.

* * *

Jack walked into Elizabeth's office and saw her sat at her desk, eating chocolate. 

"Elizabeth, I thought you were suppose to be spending more time at home and less time here"

Elizabeth eyed him suspiciously.

"If you thought I was home why did you come to my office?"

Jack walked over to her desk and picked up a bit of the chocolate.

"I heard you had chocolate."

Elizabeth smiled

"What's the real reason Jack?"

Jack nervously leant on her desk and sighed, popping a piece of chocolate into his mouth.

"We're worried about you Elizabeth. You haven't seemed like yourself"

Elizabeth bit into another piece of chocolate and glared at Jack

"What makes you think I'm not like this all the time?"

Jack tried to pick up another piece of chocolate but she batted his hand away

"Elizabeth I've spoke to Rodney and Ford. They are worried about you. Elizabeth you need to talk to someone."

Elizabeth sighed

"If memory serves you've already made me talk to a psychologist."

Jack nodded

"And if memory serves you only met with Kate twice. I hardly call two, one hour sessions talking about a problem."

Elizabeth stood up slowly walked around her desk to Jack

"Jack, I am fine. I don't need to be coddled"

Jack placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Elizabeth, I am not coddling you. I'm worried about you"

"Jack…"

Elizabeth stopped and winced in pain. Her hand shot to her abdomen.

Jack placed his hands on her arms and held her steadily

"Elizabeth are you okay?"

Jack lead her over to the small couch

"Here lay down"

Elizabeth shook her head

"I'm okay, I'm okay"

Jack laid her down on the couch, went over to the desk and picked up the phone

"Infirmary, send Dr Beckett up to Weir's office"

Elizabeth's hand stayed on her abdomen as Jack walked back to her. He placed his hand on hers.

"How long have you been in pain?"

Elizabeth winced again.

"A few hours. I just…I'm afraid Jack. I don't know if I can do this alone"

Jack held her hand lightly

"You are not alone. You have so many people who are going to help you. You and your child are not going to be alone"

Elizabeth nodded slightly as Carson came into her office and walked over to her.

Jack stepped out of the way and Carson say down next to her on the couch.

He placed his hand on Elizabeth's abdomen and felt for the baby.

"How long have you been in pain?"

Elizabeth thought the question had come from Carson until she realised it wasn't his usual Scottish accent. It was an American accent. It wasn't Jack, it was John.

She looked to her side and saw John standing behind Carson. He smiled at her.

"It's time. I'll be here with you. I promise"

Elizabeth nodded slightly, knowing it was finally over.

She dropped her head and looked at Carson.

"I'm in labour Carson"

Carson looked up at her and nodded.

"I'd say so"

Carson and Jack helped Elizabeth to her feet and steadied her.

"Let's get you down to the infirmary"

* * *

Elizabeth gripped tightly onto Rodney's hand. Rodney became red and shouted out in pain 

"Good damn it Elizabeth. Be gentle, my hands are delicate pieces of equipment."

Elizabeth glared at him, Aiden, sensing this was going to end worse for Rodney ushered him out of the way.

"Rodney why don't you go do something and I'll stay here with Dr Weir?"

Rodney looked at him hurt.

"I want to be here for her…"

Elizabeth cut him off

"…Rodney if you care for me, you'll go get me chocolate right now"

Rodney nodded and headed out of the infirmary.

Aiden grabbed Elizabeth's hand. He lightly squeezed it and smiled at her.

"You know you're going to be okay"

Elizabeth smiled and gently squeezed his hand back

"Thank you Aiden"

Another contraction hit her and she cried in pain trying to avoid hurting Aiden's hand.

The pain subsided as she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked to her side and saw John standing there.

"You're doing fine. They can't see me, so we can't talk properly."

He bent down and kissed her forehead, sliding his fingers though her hair.

"This is going to happen quickly. Soon you're going to see our son"

Elizabeth nodded slyly as another contraction hit her.

Carson came to her and smiled

"I think we'll be meeting your child within the hour. This seems like a quick labour Elizabeth"

Elizabeth nodded slowly, tears forming in her eyes because she knew that as soon as her baby was born John would finally leave her.

John looked at her. He didn't want this, he didn't want to leave her but he had no choice. He'd made a decision with the Ancients.  
He would be allowed to stay with Elizabeth for the duration of her pregnancy and after that he wouldn't be able to make contact with her again. He could watch over her but not make contact.  
He'd done it to ensure his son's safety from all the dangers in the world and beyond. The Ancients hadn't been happy but John did have help from Oma and they eventually agreed but with a clause. If John left the Ancients, they would stop their protection on his child. They needed John and would do everything in their power to stop him leaving

John turned to her.

"Remember that night after we came back from P2X-455?"

Elizabeth nodded slowly.

"We went out to the balcony and looked at the stars. I held you in my arms and I kissed you for the first time. That was one of the happiest days of my life. And you're about to make me that happy again"

* * *

"Bloody hell" 

Elizabeth cried in pain as the final contraction hit her.

She collapsed on the pillows behind her as she heard the small wail of a baby.  
Elizabeth smiled and looked to John.  
She watched as he started to fade away into the blinding light she'd seen before,

"He's beautiful Elizabeth, just like you. I love you and I love him. Make sure he knows that"

Elizabeth let the tears she'd been holding back fall as John finally disappeared.  
Elizabeth closed her eyes as she felt something being put in her arms.  
She opened her eyes and looked down at the small baby. One of his hands was waving at her while the other one was in his mouth being chewed on.

"You have a beautiful baby boy Elizabeth"

Elizabeth drew her finger down his cheek tenderly until he reached and grabbed her finger with his tiny little hand.  
Elizabeth turned to Carson, Aiden and Rodney who had re-entered the room 15 minutes earlier

"Thank you for being here, but if you don't mind. I'd like a little time alone with him"

All three of them nodded

"Of course. He's so beautiful Elizabeth"

Elizabeth smiled at Aiden's comment as they left her alone. She placed a delicate kiss on his tiny head

"Hey, hey my sweet boy. Your daddy would be so proud of you. He's looking over you though, and he loves you so much. And so do I. You'll have everything you want and need. I'll protect you from anything. What do you think about the name Jonathan, in tribute to a great man?"

The baby gurgled and smiled at her.

"You like that name. How would you like to be called that?"

He gurgled again and Elizabeth smiled

"Jonathan Sheppard it is then"

**

* * *

A week later**

Elizabeth walked from the kitchen with her son in her arms as she heard a knock on the door.

"Shall we go see who that is? Yeah"

She opened the door and was met with a big teddy bear, waving at her. Behind it, Jack smiled at her.

Elizabeth glared at him

"Are you trying to bribe my son?"

She moved away from the door and let him in. She closed the door and led Jack into the living room, placing Jonathan into a small cradle.

Jack placed the teddy bear onto an empty chair.

"And something for his mother"

He pulled a box of chocolates from behind his back.

Elizabeth smiled, took the chocolates and placed them on the desk.

"Thank you. You want a drink."

Jack shook his head.

Elizabeth ushered for him to sit down on the couch and Elizabeth sat next to him.

"What can I do for you Jack?"

Jack glared.

"I can't just see my favourite diplomat without having an agenda?"

Elizabeth nodded

"Come on Jack. Let's be straight."

Jack nodded and looked over at Jonathan.

"How are the two of you?"

Elizabeth smiled

"We'll be okay."

Jack smiled back at her before moving over to the crib and picking up Jonathan

"He was visiting you, wasn't he?"

Elizabeth lowered her head slightly

"How do you know?"

Jack sat back down and bounced Jonathan on his knee slightly.

"When Daniel was ascended he came back sometimes to guide us. You were so…private. I thought since the beginning, when you told us about when you saw him that he wouldn't leave so easily. When you told us you were pregnant. Well, I just knew…"

Elizabeth nodded and leant back.

"I always thought it would be easier after I'd had Jonathan. But it's not. I still need him"

She closed her eyes and let a few tears fall.

"He'll need his father. I'm not good at the whole male role-model thing."

Jack nodded

"You might not be, but he'll have lots of people looking out for him and most of them will be men. Me, Danny, Ford, Carson and Rodney, we are all here for you."

Elizabeth sat forward and nodded taking Jonathan from Jack's arms.

"I know. But it's not going to be the same"

* * *

Elizabeth was woken up later that night by crying coming from the room continued to hers, her son's room. She slid out of bed and began to walk over to the room when the crying stopped. Elizabeth was filled with a feeling of warmth. She walked into her son's room and stopped herself at the doorway, observing what was happening. 

Around Jonathan's crib was a bright white light, but it didn't scare either of them, it calmed them. Slowly the white light began to form and it changed into that of a man. Into that of John's.

John slowly picked up his son, who was gurgling at him, obviously recognizing who he was.

"Hey, shhh. My little boy. I can't believe how much you look like your mother. But you got my hair. That'll drive your mother crazy, especially when it comes to class photographs."

She watched as John closed his eyes and placed a kiss on his son's head

"I love you kid. Always remember that. I'm glad I got to hold you. Even if I never get to do it again. I should go now. I love you"

Elizabeth watched as John disappeared into a white light with Jonathan still in his arms. The light gently guided Jonathan back into his cradle before disappearing through the roof.

Elizabeth smiled, tears filling her eyes.

They'd be okay.

Fin…


End file.
